Household Memos

Dear Hypoglycemia,

Ha! I beat you! You thought you could keep me mysteriously ill until the end of time. The bag of trail mix in my purse says you were wrong.

Smugly yours,
Sarah

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Dear Shiny New Ideas,

I love you. Really, I do. But do you HAVE to all come at once? I mean, that's ten of you in under three months. I'm a fast writer, but I'm not THAT fast. Maybe you could talk amongst yourselves and decide which of you is most important so that I can write that one. Or, you know, you could step back and let the books that were here first have their chance.

Your slave/ruler,
Sarah

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Dear High School Play,

You are sucking away my life like a parasitical vampire baby, and I do not mean that in a good way. Yes, I have been missing theatre for the last few years. I may even have learned a lot from you. But I haven't touched my (numerous) WIPs in weeks. Fortunately, you will be dead and gone by ten o'clock on Friday night.

Best,
Sarah

P.S. That was advertising, people! Come, come, come to Magrath High School and see me dance and sing in a fake leather jacket! It'll be fun! 7 PM, March 27th to 30th!

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Dear Southern Alberta,

I understand that you have weather issues. I can cope with that. I happen to like wind and snow in moderation. But this is taking things too far. Do you know what March 20th is? It's the first day of SPRING. Does this look like spring? No, it does not.

Get with the program.
Sarah

P.S. Do you know what is outside my window right now? Robins. There are robins hopping around in the snow. I think they are giving you a hint.